“Get the camera out of my face!”
“Oh wow, I look terrible in that picture. Thank God for the delete button!”
“Hey, just saw your profile… do you mind taking down that one shot of me…you know, the one from that party in high school where my face is stuffed with easy cheese…”
These are phrases and questions (demands, really!) that we’ve all heard before. Whether we’ve heard it from loved ones or out of our own mouths, all of us have a photo (or two or ten *cough*) that we’d rather keep in that dusty box under the bed. Or hidden permanently from our timelines.
There’s a vanity in all of us, whether or not we want to admit it, to look our very best, especially to the outside world. It seems to be intrinsic in our psyches, but it can be taken too far.
When you think of someone who is obsessed with how they look, with which pictures they will allow on social media, getting the right lighting and filter, etc., teens probably come to mind first. But adults think about this stuff, too. They too ask friends to remove or delete “unflattering” pictures of them. They too spend hours getting the lighting or angles just right. They too download editing apps created to actually change the way they physically look in their pictures. I admit it, I’ve done some of these things, too!
Perhaps sadder than anything, many people- young and old- go to great lengths to avoid being in front of the camera altogether. Have you ever done this? Are you that one who always volunteers to take the family group photo, just so that you do not have to be in it?
If so, let’s take a walk together through the hypothetical future….
You’re on your death bed, let’s say at about 100 years old after living a rich, full life. All of your children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren surround you. You pass away, and have a beautiful funeral in which you are honored and remembered for the wonderful person you were. In the days and weeks and years to come, your children try to go on with their lives but still want to remember you. Where do they turn to?
Your family and friends who are left behind to grieve your loss will not care one little bit what you weighed in those photos. No one is going to think that your face looked weird four decades ago or that you once had braces or double chins or wrinkles. They won’t care that your face was stuffed with a burger, that the angle was wrong or the lighting was off.
They just want to be able to see you and remember you. Will you be there smiling back at them?
Take the picture <3
My husband loves to build with LEGOs.
He has a pretty impressive collection of LEGO masterpieces, as he calls them, ranging from little people consisting of just a few bricks, to a giant ship (the “Sea Cow”) consisting of 2,741 bricks.
Austin's "Sea Cow"
LEGO these days isn’t just for young kids! Adults love to build with the colorful bricks, too. Besides kits featuring fantastical creatures from movies and TV shows, there is the LEGO Architecture series, which anyone can construct fairly easily using the instructions provided. You can build the Taj Mahal, Buckingham Palace, and the White House, just to name a few.
But you certainly don’t have to buy an expensive kit to make something amazing with LEGO. As long as you have the right bricks, and the gumption, you can design and build anything you can possibly imagine. You can personalize your LEGO experience.
Personalization is very important to today’s youth. As these generations get older, and inevitably and eventually require death care services, personalization of funerals is also going to become more and more commonplace. In fact, over the past decade, many funeral homes and corporations have already begun to advertise and encourage custom services.
Did your great aunt love to garden? Take a look through our garden-themed funeral package, complete with seed envelopes as “party” favors for guests. This will be a celebration of life!
Oh, Grandad loved to fish? We actually offer fisherman-themed caskets and matching sprays. Care to browse our selection?
Your son loved LEGO? Have you considered ordering a custom LEGO-themed casket? (seehttp://www.dailyundertaker.com/2012/03/funeral-home-facilitates-incredible.html ).
Whether a funeral or memorial service is customized or traditional, or takes place at the funeral parlor, the church, or in the home, the important thing is to remember and celebrate your loved one and the life they lived.
Including through the eulogy :)
Eulogies by Aubrey offers 100% personalized eulogies, using your words and your “voice.” If you are planning a personalized funeral or memorial service for your loved one, we are here to assist you in doing so.
Most of us have been there.
You lose someone who is very close to you, someone you cared for very much and who cared for you. You can barely make it out of bed, barely function at all the jobs you have to accomplish. The world keeps going as if nothing happened, and mercilessly insists that you still keep up. You have trouble even breathing when you realize, over and over, that you will never see this person again, at least not for a long while. Your eyes are puffy from tears that seem to never stop flowing.
Your heart feels literally heavy in your chest.
These are times when, as is often said, grief knows no words.
The irony of it is, often times the person who is closest to the one who has passed away, is the person asked to provide the eulogy for the funeral service. In most cases, a person dies, has their services and final disposition within just one week of the passing. This one left behind who has barely begun to even process what has just happened, is tasked with writing a lengthy reading to be given in front of other grieving family and friends. They are obligated to think objectively, to dig up memories featuring their loved one (probably some they haven’t thought about in years) and try to put everything into proper sequence in the hope of appropriately representing their loved one and the life they lived.
Even great writers would have trouble doing that.
There is nothing wrong with asking for help. Within the realm of funeral service, there are many people available and standing by to offer you any assistance you may need. The funeral director is not just a salesperson… he or she is a counselor. The pastor is not just repeating tired old verses and prayers…they have been there. The funeral home apprentice…well, she doesn’t have all the answers yet, but she sure knows who to ask to get them for you :)
Eulogies by Aubrey is one of those who is standing by 24/7 to offer you support should you ever need it. We too have been there, and when your grief knows no words, we will be right here to create your words for you.
“If I had a single flower for every time I think about you, I could walk forever in my garden.” -Claudia Adrienne Grandi
Think about the last time you went to a funeral or memorial service. The first thing you may have noticed when you walked through the doors of the church or parlor was the abundance of floral arrangements. Lilies, roses, orchids, and gladiolus are only a few of the most popular, and most fragrant, blooms to be sent in memory of the dearly departed. You’ll find these beautiful, colorful blossoms adorning every table, corner and boutonniere right up to the casket, urn or memory table.
Sending flowers is such a popular practice even in modern funeral services, that funeral homes still have a special flower room just for receiving baskets and sprays. Often, when a death has just occurred, the undertaker who picks up the body will also leave a rose or carnation in the bed or with the next of kin as a token of respect.
Why do we send flowers to funerals or the homes of a family or friend who has just lost a loved one? It may seem like a no-brainer…flowers are, after all, an age-old way to show that you are thinking of someone. They are bright and beautiful, and serve to remind us that life goes on even when we are surrounded by darkness and grief. They smell lovely, giving us a little lift in our spirits just when we need it the most.
While it’s true that in times gone by fragrant blooms were used for more practical reasons, mainly to cover up the stench of decomposition, today that is simply not the case. Flowers are not needed for this purpose anymore, especially in cases of embalming, cremation, or even just refrigeration. These days they serve as symbols of reverence and comfort for the family.
Of course, flowers are not only for funerals! They can be offered as a romantic gesture, as a birthday gift, in celebration of a birth, or even as a sign of friendship. What is your favorite flower? Let us know in a comment below!
When someone we love very much dies (or when we have suffered a great loss or stress of any kind), our minds automatically search for a way to cope. Subconsciously or not, as a way to cope with the grief we are feeling, we may revert to some simple comforts of our childhoods. We may watch an old movie we haven’t seen in awhile, flip through some photo albums, or listen to a familiar song that has never failed to calm us down. We may take very long bubble baths or take very long naps. We may even sleep with an old stuffed animal for a few days, if that makes us feel better, and that is totally fine. That tattered old stuffed animal may very well be a Winnie-the-Pooh (wow, smooth bridge there!)
Originally debuted in 1924 by English author A.A. Milne, Winnie-the-Pooh is a lovable storybook teddy bear from almost all of our childhood memories. A creature of classic tale and also of timeless wit, Pooh has captured the imaginations of artists, writers, philosophers, and children alike the world over. Besides in kids’ picture books and TV series, he can be found in publications and media geared toward adults, including Benjamin Hoff’s The Tao of Pooh, John Tyerman Williams’ Pooh and the Philosophers, and most recently Disney’s live-action adaptation Christopher Robin.
Children sense a natural kinship with the winsome bear, whose gentle humor and whimsical adventures through the Hundred Acre Wood easily capture their attentions. But Winnie-the-Pooh’s attitude of mindfulness is also one to be desired by grownups, who strive daily to catch a glimpse of his innocent, restful existence in our own often chaotic worlds. Grownups pray, we meditate, we cry, we sleep, but Pooh just is (his go-with-the-flow attitude is in contrast to that of his friend Eeyore, who possesses a more dysthymic melancholy but who is nonetheless accepted just as he is). Much like a child, Pooh is generally content with his life no matter if he feels happy or bothered; he is content in his everlasting state of doing nothing, which he finds joy in:
“Don’t underestimate the value of Doing Nothing, of just going along, listening to all the things you can’t hear, and not bothering.” -Pooh
Doing Nothing sounds extremely attractive when one’s mind is under the weight of the heavy emotions of grief…when one’s heart is burdened by the memories of a loved one we’ll never see again, at least not for a very long time. For all his simplicity, even Pooh knows how that kind of sadness can feel. When Christopher Robin revealed that he would soon be leaving for the ever-elusive “school,” Pooh did not quite understand what or where exactly that was. He didn’t know what Christopher Robin would be doing all day there, all he knew was that Christopher would not be spending the days with him anymore. Even through his sadness, however, Pooh also knew “how lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.”
Winnie-the-Pooh quotes are often featured in eulogies, especially those for young children. If you are searching for the perfect Pooh quote, for a funeral service or just for your own reverie, here are a couple of sites that may be of interest to you: