HAPPY NEW YEAR FROM EULOGIES BY AUBREY

It goes without saying, but 2020 was one for the books, in the worst possible way. If you were someone who lost a loved one this year, you were undoubtedly especially affected.

In 2020, I was honored to write eulogies for several families who lost loved ones during the pandemic. I was also privileged to pen eulogies for beloved members of my own family. Grieving was experienced in unprecedented ways during 2020. COVID made it harder for many families to come together to grieve, due to funeral home restrictions or health reasons. Still others were drawn to the idea of home funerals and/or green burial practices.

Looking to the bright side - Eulogies by Aubrey was blessed to have grown quite a lot in 2020, with this being the second year we've been in operation. Earlier this year we made our way (finally!) to the first page of Google, a major business goal I had set from the beginning. Now that I'm able to reach more people who are in need of a eulogy writer, I look forward to serving more families in the future, in my own community and beyond. And more than anything, I want to thank you for supporting my small business and for allowing me to support you in your time of need.

It's no secret that the holidays bring about all kinds of emotions and feelings for many people. If you are grieving the loss of a loved one, whether that loss was recent or occurred years ago, Christmas and New Year's have a pesky way of making that loss seem fresh all over again. If you are holding sadness and longing in your heart over the loss of your loved one, I would like to end this little blog with a quote just for you, from one of my favorite writers of all time, Anne Frank:

"What a wonderful thought it is that some of the best days of our lives haven't even happened yet."

She was wise beyond her years.

And believe it or not right now, you have much to look forward to...you just have to keep looking forward.

From my family to yours, I wish you a safe, peaceful and hopeful New Year 2021.

-Aubrey

Hello friends and neighbors. We are in the midst of the holidays now, so I just wanted to drop a line and remind you that Eulogies by Aubrey is open on Christmas Day as well as New Year's.

In fact, my eulogy writing service operates 24/7/365. If you have experienced the loss of a loved one, have been tasked with writing their eulogy and need help getting all your thoughts organized, I am more than honored to assist you. Please let me know how I can help you in a message here, and I will be in touch with you shortly.

You can also check out my Eulogy Writing Service page and FAQ page for additional helpful information.

As a member of the funeral/death care community, specifically online, I see a great longing for spirituality, almost everywhere I look. A longing to look past the shadows of death and to embrace the unknown, to transcend what we’ve been conditioned to believe about dying and to create a new belief system surrounding it. There is a longing to connect with a higher self, with a higher power that is apathetic to the inevitability of death. There is a longing to understand the “Universe,” or “God,” or “Whatever you want to call it.”
 
There are “living funerals” designed to mimic one’s own future demise in order to increase one’s appreciation for life. There is yoga and meditation to try and reach the “god” within. There are crystals, chakras, and other elements of the new age being used during such sessions as a way to heighten one’s awareness of one’s own mortality.
 
There are organizations calling for the fusion of “birth, breath and death” into one giant cultural and spiritual awakening. Sans the Christian God. There are death doulas and death midwives and the spiritual idea of “holding space” for those who have entered the dying process.
 
There is everything you could imagine, every philosophy, every sequence, every breathing technique, every religion, all presented in an effort to find peace in death. To find positivity in death. Except for the turning of the heart and eye to the Lord.
 
Over these past several months, God has been showing me, time and time again, that this need for spiritual experience in death is being sought after in all the wrong places. It is reached for in the moon, in the stars, in the sun, in a deck of cards, in yoga, in crystals, in meditation, in nature, in enlightenment, in books on every topic under the sun. In everything but the Bible.

It's tempting to take a peek at any one of these things (pick your poison), just because EVERYONE is doing it...but they're all false gods.
 
I've been reminded that there is no peace in death, in life, in anything at all, apart from Him Who rules over everything. Apart from Him who rules the universe and everything in it.
 
What I’m trying to say is, I don’t think we’re supposed to be looking for positivity in death. I’m now thinking that to search for positivity in death is to search for positivity in sin, where there is none. Death is the ultimate loneliness. It is decay. It is a point of no return.
 
Death is, by Biblical definition, separation from God and all of this that goes with it.
 
Yes, we have it in our power to ease the pain and sorrow surrounding death. I am not against this at all. I am not against any medical measures taken to ease the suffering of those who are dying. Not against providing comfort to those who are dying or who are watching a loved one die. Not against honoring and memorializing loved ones through the funeral ritual. But in the end, I think, the ugliness remains. Just as there is agony in childbirth because of sin (Genesis 3:16), there is utter darkness in death because of sin (Romans 6:23). No matter how we try to find a way around it, it is there.
 
I had previously studied the death positive movement (think The Order of the Good Death, etc.) and at one point even thought that I was a part of it, that I could agree with it and what it stands for. I’d written about it in my About Me section on my website, for crying out loud! But the more I think about it, as a Christian, I don’t think I can support this movement anymore, for the reasons I’ve laid out here.
 
So, I’m reversing this attitude and suppositions where this topic is concerned. Death is supposed to be sad, to be scary, to be depressing, and sometimes to be horrid. At least at it’s core. It is the wage of sin. We are not supposed to want to stare it in its face. To see our loved ones wracked by it.

Humans are naturally scared silly of death and dying. We naturally shun away from dead things, no matter how much we see it and no matter how we may force-train our minds to find a way around it. This is because we weren't made to do that, at all. We weren't created to die or to be exposed to death, in any way, shape or form. We were made for life.
 
The death positive movement wants to bring death out from behind the closed doors of the funeral home and into the home again. It wants to erase the stigma surrounding dead bodies and what goes into preparing them for the final goodbye. It wants to pave new paths for those in mourning to see their dead loved ones in a way that they simply are not. An attempt to cover it up either with embalming or with flower petals.
 
The death positive movement calls death “natural” and simply a part of life. It all sounds lovely...well, as lovely as it can be. But death is only “natural” in a sin-stricken world. And it’s not a part of life, it’s the opposite of life. To try and find the “normal” in death is futile; because it is not normal at all. It is most certainly unnatural. This is because God’s original design was for eternal life, not death.
 
The only true peace you will ever know, concerning either a loved one’s death or your own looming mortality, is the peace that is to be found in Jesus. The world says, “Look here, the latest new thing to ponder!” and “This philosophy is the real deal” and “Death is simply a journey from this world to the next” and “Death is safe.” It is all a farce and one that I now believe Satan is weaving his crooked spine in and out of.
 
Death is only safe if you have found salvation in Christ. Without Him, all else is tied to sin. All else is no man's land. Every single other thing either comes back to Him or goes straight down into the grave, every single time.

-Aubrey

I know you write eulogies, but I need to create my loved one's obituary as well and don't know where to start. Can you help with that too?

I've gotten this question a few times, and the answer is...yes, absolutely! Actually, I offer a complimentary obit, upon request, with each eulogy order. No extra charges. So let that stress fall off your shoulders right now.

Just let me know in your initial contact email, or upon completing your eulogy order form, that you would also like an obit written. I may have a few additional basic questions I will need to ask you in order to complete your loved one's obit, but chances are I will have all info needed from the eulogy order form.

Don't let the stress of planning for your loved one's funeral coincide with the stress of getting their eulogy written as well as their obit. I'm here, and I'm more than honored, to help you out.

-Aubrey

How much do you charge for a eulogy, and are there any additional fees?
 
I charge a one-time fee of $125 for an approximately 1000-word eulogy. There are no additional fees and any revisions you require are included in this charge.
 
How do I pay and when?
 
I am able to accept all major cards as well as PayPal. I do request payment before I begin work on your eulogy, simply to protect against those few who would take advantage of the reverse process.
 
How long will it take for me to speak my eulogy?
 
Depending on how much information you provide, your finished eulogy will contain approximately 1000 words and should generally take between six and eight minutes to deliver. If you would prefer a longer or shorter eulogy, please let me know.

How long will it take for you to finish my eulogy?
 
I will work to complete your order and have it sent back to you within 48 hours. If you need it sooner or within a certain time frame, please let me know.
 
How will you get my completed eulogy to me?
 
I will send your eulogy to the email address that you provide me on the order form. I will send it as a message and also as an attachment so that you may print/utilize it at your convenience. If you do not receive your eulogy within 48 hours, please check your spam folder. It will be sent from eulogiesbyaubrey@gmail.com.

 Can I see one of your writing samples?
 
Yes. Click here to be taken to my Eulogy Examples page.

I've already written out parts of my eulogy, but need help putting it all together and making it sound good. Can you help with that?

Absolutely! Many of my clients already have all of their thoughts on paper and simply need me to make it "speech" worthy. If this is you, send me what you have, and I'll take it from there.

My loved one has not yet passed away, but it is imminent. I'm thinking of going ahead and starting the brainstorming process for their eulogy. Can you help?

Yes. It's actually a fairly common - and even smart, I would say - move to try and get your thoughts down (things that you would like represented in your eulogy) ahead of your loved one's passing. Just let me know if this is your situation, and I am more than willing to assist you every step of the way.

I have suffered the loss of a child. Are you still able to help?

Yes. Please note that the form on my Order page is generally for adult loss. If you have suffered miscarriage, infant or child loss, please let me know in a message here. I have a special eulogy order form for you that I will send to you.

I recently lost my pet and plan to hold a service in their memory. Would you be willing to write a eulogy for them?
 
I would be honored. Our pets are our family and losing any one of them would be the same as losing a family member. Let me know in a message here, and I will send you a separate order form.

At this time I cannot bring myself to fill out the eulogy order form. Can you still help?
 
Absolutely... I understand that there are times when grief knows no words. There is an art to writing quality work with little information, and I'm confident in my ability to do so. Fill out what you can of the order form, send it to me and I will let you know if any additional information is needed. Or if you are more comfortable, email me at eulogiesbyaubrey@gmail.com. If you prefer to speak with me by phone, please leave your number in your email and I will contact you as soon as possible.

I am not able to pay your fee right now, but I still need help with a eulogy. What can I do?

I am very aware that not everyone has the means to hire a professional writer to assist them with their eulogy, or even family or friends who are able to help. But I believe that every loved one who has passed on deserves a quality eulogy. So I offer anyone who needs it a free eulogy template. Click here for more information. If you have questions or are in need of further assistance, please do not hesitate to contact me.
 
What are your hours of operation?
 
I am available 24/7/365*. For nighttime orders and email inquiries, please expect a response from me no later than the very next morning.

*It is rare, but sometimes due to personal time constraints, I will need to step away from business for a short time. During these times, there will be a pop-up on my website letting you know, and you will still be able to contact me with any questions or concerns you have.
 
Can I request a refund?
 
I cannot provide a refund for a completed eulogy. However, if you have just paid and have decided not to use Eulogies by Aubrey, and in the case I have not already begun extensive work on your order, I would be happy to provide you with a full refund, no questions asked.

Remember to keep an eye on my FAQ page for updates as they appear. If you ever have any other questions for me, please do not hesitate to reach out. I am available 24/7/365.

-Aubrey

I am a wife, mother and Christ follower with dual passions for writing and death care. I have years of professional writing and editing experience, and have worked in both corporate and family-owned funeral homes in the DFW area. I am married to the love of my life, Austin, and together we share a beautiful daughter.

In 2017, I graduated from the Dallas Institute of Funeral Service, where I studied funeral directing, embalming and restorative art, counseling, grief psychology, composition and public speaking as it relates to funeral service. I hold certifications in cremation arrangement and operation (ICCFA), as well as burial at sea (NEBAS), and am also a guest writer for US Urns Online.

For any questions or thoughts you may have, feel free to reach out to me today.

-Aubrey

Our website recently underwent a little construction!

When navigating the new style of our eulogy service website, Eulogies by Aubrey, you'll notice that many things remain the same as they always have. The overall look and layout hasn't really changed that much. The main changes we've made are almost unnoticeable, but significant, all in an attempt to make the site more personal, personable, and user- friendly for those who are seeking help writing a eulogy for a loved one.

We've prioritized pages and tabs to minimize disarray and maximize user-ability, enhanced our Eulogy Resources page, updated links throughout our blog and made the overall interface easier for visitors to navigate and find what they need. Perhaps most importantly, we've updated our SEO in an effort to reach more of the people who really need our help.

So check it out and let us know what you think! We have already received comments and emails offering suggestions and other helpful info...so please feel free to share any tips and ideas that you have as well. Eulogies by Aubrey is still a young, growing business and we appreciate our readers' comments.

Fears over Coronavirus, implementation of social distancing, and other measures being put into place to combat further spread of the virus are affecting the funeral industry in unprecedented ways. While it may seem that everything is being closed, cancelled, or postponed (even funeral services), rest assured that Eulogies by Aubrey will remain open 24/7 in an effort to help in any way we can. We are able to do so by operating entirely online/by phone.

Are you trying to plan a funeral in the middle of COVID-19? Are you wanting to complete a eulogy for your loved one but are running low on time or energy? I want to help. Please feel free to contact me with any questions or concerns you may have.

Note: If during these uncertain times you are experiencing financial hardship, but you are still needing assistance writing a eulogy for your loved one, do not hesitate to reach out with your concerns. I believe that every loved one deserves a quality eulogy, no matter the circumstance, and I am here to help make that happen.

-Aubrey

Fears over Coronavirus, implementation of social distancing, and other measures being put into place to combat further spread of the virus are affecting the funeral industry in unprecedented ways. While it may seem that everything is being closed, cancelled, or postponed (even funeral services), rest assured that Eulogies by Aubrey will remain open 24/7 in an effort to help in any way we can. We are able to do so by operating entirely online/by phone.

Are you trying to plan a funeral in the middle of COVID-19? Are you wanting to complete a eulogy for your loved one but are running low on time or energy? I want to help. Please feel free to contact me with any questions or concerns you may have.

Note: If during these uncertain times you are experiencing financial hardship, but you are still needing assistance writing a eulogy for your loved one, do not hesitate to reach out with your concerns. I believe that every loved one deserves a quality eulogy, no matter the circumstance, and I am here to help make that happen.

Please take care,
Aubrey Bauer

BEGINNINGS
Born in 1945 and raised in the Bronx, New York, Lawrence Gordon Tesler felt his calling in the yet budding field of computer science while still a student in high school. After impressing a teacher with a complicated prime number algorithm, he enrolled in a computer class at Columbia University, where he essentially taught himself computer programming. Upon graduation from Stanford University in 1965, he worked various programming jobs before landing a spot with the Xerox Palo Alto Research Center. It was there at PARC that he was first began work on the Gypsy Word Processor, and also first began contemplating ideas on what the future of human-computer interaction would look like.

COPY & PASTE REVOLUTION
While at PARC- the same place that introduced the world to the computer mouse- Larry Tesler came up with an idea that would revolutionize computer programming (and everyday work and play for the layperson). That idea was Cut, Copy & Paste. Such a simple notion, but one of the many "little" things he developed to ensure easy user interface for all...and not just those who were formally educated in computer science. This "counterculture" idea was unheard of back in the '60s, but it was something that he would advocate for for the rest of his life.

NO MODES
To further develop a seamless user experience, Tesler also promoted and actively worked on the idea of a "modeless" computer system. Basically, he felt that the everyday user shouldn't have to switch in between modes or functions depending on what they were doing while computing. He was so passionate about modeless computing, in fact, that his official website is nomodes.com, as is his Twitter handle and even a license plate on his car at one point.

FURTHER WORK
After PARC, Tesler went on to work with Apple at the request of Steve Jobs. There he helped to develop many pioneering software programs, including Macintosh and QuickTime. Following his 17-year tenure there, he moved on to several other high-profile companies- Yahoo, Amazon and Stagecast.

DEATH
On February 16th, 2020, at the age of 74, Larry Tesler passed away at his home in San Fransisco. There is not very much information available surrounding his cause of death, nor whether he was buried or cremated. But his legacy lives on in the computer innovations that he pushed to bring to you and me.

You can learn more about Larry Tesler's life's works here.

-Aubrey

Quotes are amazing things. I love quotes. They provide you with a gist of what a book or article is about without having to actually read the whole thing. They provide comfort in times of sorrow, explanation where none other is to be found, solace in the midst of loneliness and just the right amount of disturbance whenever the situation calls for it. You can look up a quote for just about anything and any occasion, to help you through a hard time or to remind you just how far God has brought you in life.

QuOtEs!

Today is Valentine's Day, a day of love and affection for many. But I think it's also a day of sorrow, longing and deep reflection for perhaps even more...whether you've lost someone to death or to life (whoa). If you already know that you're going to be struggling with difficult feelings today, it's likely that this day used to mean something to you that it no longer can. So today, in the midst of all the unwarranted lovey-dovey-ness you're bound to encounter- whether at work, on social media, at the grocery store (a dozen roses for only $15!), or on TV when you're trying to relax at home after the day is over, please be sure to find some time for yourself.

Because you're not alone.

Make today a day that you place the focus on yourself. Practice some self love, whether that be taking a bubble bath, snuggling up with a blanket and a warm cup of tea, or listening to your favorite song over and over. Give your pet some extra love today. Buy yourself dinner (and maybe that dozen roses for only $15). Open your Bible and melt into the peace and true love that only God can provide.

And maybe read a couple of these quotes to help get your started.

Here are just 8 quotes that have resonated with me in one way or another throughout my life thus far. I hope they bless you as you read them, too, from your own perspective and in your own way. Links are included where I could find them so that you can read/listen to the sources too, if you want. We all understand words differently and take our own messages away from what we read or hear (especially on days like today), so with that in mind, let's begin.

-Aubrey