Tackling Public Speaking

When I was studying at Dallas Institute of Funeral Service, I had to take a speech class. If you know me at all, I am a little on the quiet side. So when I saw the syllabus, I just knew that this was going to be my least favorite class (after chemistry, that is)!
 
No matter what your personality type, whether you are outgoing or introverted, carefree or an empath, chances are the thought of giving a speech in front of a crowd of people gives you the willies, at least at first.
 
If you are asked to give a eulogy for someone you love who has passed away, you can add onto that all the emotional stresses that come with it…it can turn into a daunting task for anyone.
 
Some people say it helps to practice giving your speech in front of a mirror. Others say it’s best to pretend that everyone in your audience is wearing polka-dotted underwear on their heads! Still others suggest maintaining eye contact with one person in the audience the entire time (as if that’s not awkward at all!)
 
While some of those tips may be helpful for you, none of them have personally helped me the few times in my life I’ve had to give a speech! (If you are curious, what did help me during my college speech class was to remember that everyone else was far more concerned about how their own speeches were going to go, than how mine was going!)
 
DISCLAIMER: I may be a writer of eulogies, but I’m not an orator in any way, shape, or form. For what it’s worth though, here are some of the best tips I could think of for overcoming nervousness while giving a speech, and specifically a eulogy (I will probably be coming back to this blog in the future if I am ever tasked with giving a speech or eulogy myself!):
 

• Remember that this speech is not about you, it’s all about your loved one. Remembering this can help you to keep your mind focused more on what you are saying and less on how you are coming across.

 

• If you usually have a quiet speaking voice, and it feels less than natural to project your voice across a large room, make use of a microphone if there is one available.

 

• Keep in mind that it is 100% okay to become emotional while delivering your eulogy. No one is going to judge you for tearing up or even weeping…especially on today of all days. So don’t worry about it.

 

• During a speech class, you are graded on whether or not you make proper eye contact with your audience. There is no need to feel this kind of pressure while giving a eulogy. If it is more natural for you to look around the room as you are speaking, or even to improvise, more power to you! But it’s totally fine to memorize your eulogy or to look down and read from your notes the entire time, too.

 

• Some people find it comforting to wear sunglasses while giving a eulogy. This way, if you do get teary-eyed while speaking, you do not have the added pressure of everyone noticing right away.

 
Hopefully you found this blog helpful! For more tips on giving a eulogy, check out these links from Eulogies by Aubrey’s Resources & Help page:
 
https://www.everplans.com/articles/4-tips-for-successfully-speaking-at-a-funeral
 
https://www.imortuary.com/blog/speaking-at-a-funeral-public-speaking-tips/
 
http://www.speaking-tips.com/Articles/Delivering-A-Eulogy.aspx
 
-Aubrey